


15x20

by CastielsCarma



Category: Real Person Fiction, Supernatural
Genre: 15x20 adjacent, Conversations, Destiel Adjacent, Dom/sub Undertones, I don't acknowledge the ending, I don't know what else to tag this as, M/M, Quote: Y yo a ti Cas | Me too (Supernatural), slightly crackish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:54:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,583
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27827080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CastielsCarma/pseuds/CastielsCarma
Summary: Jensen tries to focus but all he feels is an overwhelming urge to slap Misha. And Misha knows something is up because of course, he knows.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Jensen Ackles/Misha Collins
Comments: 32
Kudos: 130





	15x20

**Author's Note:**

> Well, I had some feels again and had to write something. 
> 
> As always I hope you enjoy <3
> 
> (I personally believe that the writers are on our side, the ending got rewritten/edited by the network, and that in 15x18 Dean did reciprocate because of reasons).
> 
> This piece can be read together with this one https://archiveofourown.org/works/27426094 15x18
> 
> Kudos and comments make me bloom like a tired flower, finally finding water in the desert.

For the first time in forever, Jensen has the urge to slap Misha. Not playfully – him being a brat Misha would say with a grin – but hard, so it burns. Maybe Misha will even gasp in shock.

“What do you mean no?” Jensen adds the “Sir?” just a breath too late but Misha notices. Of course, he notices.

“Red. This stops now.” Misha gets off the bed and tosses Jensen the T-shirt he discarded earlier.

All that fury that burns within Jensen evaporates as he hears that word. Shit, he really fucked up. He knows there's no shame in calling red but he also knows that Misha did it because of him, not because he himself had been uncomfortable. Which is a good thing. Misha's always been good to him.

Right now he hates it.

Misha stares at him, gloriously naked but Jensen doesn't miss the glow in his eyes and his lips pressed into a thin line. He's angry. “Put on your clothes and sit down on the couch. I'll be right back. If I don't see your ass on that couch when I return, we won't play for a month.”

There's steel in Misha's voice and Jensen balks. “Yes, Sir – Mish.”

“Good.” Misha turns without a second glance.

Jensen sighs. He really fucked up and there is no more fucking. Double fucked.

Misha carries two mugs with something steaming as he sits down gracefully next to Jensen. He has no idea how he's managed to get dressed and fix hot chocolate in the blink of an eye.

“Thanks.” There's a blob of marshmallows floating around, slowly melting. Jensen takes a careful sip. “It's good.”

Misha smiles then and Jensen feels even shitter than before. “Wanna talk about it?”

“Sure. This is the one with more good cocoa than sugar, plain marshmallows, no syrup and full-fat milk, no water?”

Misha takes a sip of his chocolate while raising a pointed eyebrow at Jensen. Bastard looks hot and intimidating at the same time. “Jensen.”

“Fine.” Jensen rubs a hand over his face and sighs. He grabs Misha's hand as Misha puts away the mug with hot chocolate. “I'm sorry, OK? I was pissed off.”

Misha just waits with his blue eyes resting on him. Jensen resists the urge to fidget.

“I just wanted to... get lost in the moment.”

Misha nods silently. “And did it work?”

“Nope.”

“Why not?”

Jensen plays with the handle of his mug. “I was still really pissed off.”

Misha lets out an amused breath. “I knew you were. You looked like you were ready to murder someone. Is that you having your head in the game? I trust you to be honest and sincere, Jen. I trust you to _communicate._ ”

“I did communicate.”

Misha laughs then and kisses Jensen's knuckles.

And just like that, the tension eases. “What's so funny?”

“Oh, you _did_ communicate. Especially with your eyes. You looked ready to murder someone.” He rubs a soothing thumb over Jensen's hand. “I was getting Dean Winchester-vibes.”

Jensen grimaces. “Sorry, I should've said something.”

“You should've.”

Jensen leans in and kisses Misha softly on the neck. He continues upward and nuzzles close right below his ear. He inhales and smiles. If everything else changes, the things in the world that would remain constant would be Danneel's and Misha's love for him, his kids. That and the way Misha smells.

He smells of safety, love, trust, and _home_.

It's barely a whisper. “I feel betrayed.” He knows Misha's heard because he stiffens for a second before exhaling.

Jensen closes his eyes as he feels Misha's gentle fingers in his hair.

“I know you do. I feel the same.”

Jensen leans back, away from Misha. “You seem so... calm. Man, I played Dean for fifteen goddamn years. I should've trusted my gut instead of listening to – I _did_ trust my gut and then – “

“Shh.” Misha kisses his lips softly, muting the objections. “Do you want to know why I'm not more upset? Why I'm angry but don't let it consume me?”

  
“You're older, way older, and have more patience or some bullshit like that.”

“Four years is hardly – “

“Four years, feels like forty.”

Misha pushes away his face as he laughs. “Shut up.” He quiets soon. “I understand that you feel betrayed. Dean's last moments on screen were not – “

“They were not his! You know what was in the script, you know that you should've been there too. Dean just saying a one-off about Cas, in what world is that right? It was about the brothers yes.”

Misha nods.

“But it was about more. About Eileen, about Jo and Charlie, it was about Dean. Like hell, he wouldn't go looking for Cas. And I'm pissed that Dean never did say it back. He should've and it was there and then they erased that and for what? They pissed on Dean, Sam, Cas, all of us. They pissed on everything the writers have given us and on the fans. And I fucking trusted them. So yea, I'm furious.”

Misha's face softens. “I know, Jen, I know. I don't let it consume me because for me, personally, I know that anger, in the long run, doesn't do anything.”

Jensen makes a face when he thinks back on the last time, Misha really was angry at the network, and at one person in particular. “I didn't mean to bring up – “

“I know you didn't. And it was years ago. I'm fine now, _we're_ fine.”

Jensen shakes his head. “Not only did they betray us, but the network also betrayed the _fans_.”

Misha leans over and takes a gulp of now tepid chocolate. “I know that many fans do feel betrayed, as they should but I think they have something to say about that.”

Jensen grins. “You saw that too?”

“I did. Busy little fuckers. I approve. You have something to say too?”

Jensen laughs. “Oh, I do.”

“Will you?”

“Nope.”

Misha grins. “You're gonna stay silent out of pure spite.”

“Fuck yeah I am. Just us not being in the video should be a damn hint. Are people talking?”

Misha brings his legs up so he sits cross -legged and wraps an arm around Jensen, bringing him in close. “They are. The casuals, most of them are none the wiser, but our Hellers, they know. They say, 'the silence is loud.'”

“Good. Let it turn into a storm.” Jensen chuckles. “I just remembered the rancid nuts article.”

Misha grins as he splays his hands over Jensen's chest. “I do think rancid nuts are hard to digest.”

“You are totally right about that.” Jensen sighs. “Thanks, Mish, and sorry for being an ass earlier.”

“Apology accepted. We can talk punishments later.”

“Oh, come on, really?” He tries to sound upset but Misha is playing with his hair again, languidly caressing his fingers through it and it feels so damn good.

“I wouldn't be a good dom if I just allowed you to walk all over me.”

Jensen snorts. “Like that's ever gonna happen.”

“You'd be an unbearable brat if I did. Anyway, Cas did say he loved Dean. And anyone with eyes knows that Dean loves Cas.”

“Damn straight, Dean loves Cas.”

“The fans know it, the writers know it and we know it.”

Jensen mumbles. “He deserved to say it back to Cas. And the fuckers silenced him and they silenced me.”

Misha smacks his tongue. “NDA's are not forever. And there are other outlets where you can vent.”

Jensen turns to face Misha. Even now, he thinks Misha's the most gorgeous man he's ever seen. And the bastard knows it.

As if Misha is reading his mind, he does that crappy wink with his eye. Jensen smiles as he shakes his head. “I love you. So what's the other outlet you talk about?” He wiggles his brow.

“Love you too, Jen. As far as the other outlet, no it's, not _sex_.” Misha's eyes fucking _sparkle_. “It's a secret, I've been kind of keeping it from you too.” He fishes out his phone and types something in before he turns the screen to Jensen.

Jensen looks at the screen and sees one of the most famous Destiel writers and their A03 page. He's just about to ask Misha about the relevance when he notices it's in edit mode. “Shut the fuck up. Are you telling me – “

Misha's smile is huge.

“Are you telling me... t-that's _you?!_ Have you been writing Destiel fanfic for.. for – “ Jensen scrolls with his thumb. “For six fucking years?! There's a picture in this one too! Did you do that?”

Misha laughs. As if that's the detail that's unbelievable.

“I've participated in a few DeanCasBigBangs. I was actually planning on giving you a few of my fics as a Christmas present, printed and all. Wait until I show you my _other_ account.” There's a dark sparkle in Misha's eyes. “That's where I write all my kinky and dark stuff.”

“I don't know what to say, but I should've have known.”

Misha laughs and kisses Jensen. “I can write a RPF just for you, it will be my first.”

“Thanks, I guess.” He huffs out a laugh. “Maybe I'll go on Twitter today and break my silence. Tweet 'Dean loves Cas too.'”

“The fandom would implode.”

Jensen smiles, “They would. But I'll wait. I have a production company now.”

Misha kisses him softly. “That you do.”

“Love you so goddamn, Misha.”

“Y Yo a ti, Jen.” Misha grins.

“Shut up.”


End file.
